Hello again! I wanted to start this blog with a quote that I read on my IG:
“The reason you want every single thing that you want, is because you think you will feel really good when you get there. But, if you don’t feel really good on your way to there, you can’t get there. You have to be satisfied with the what-is while you’re reaching for more.” – Abraham Hicks
This quote today really touched my heart. I had a really tough 2 years, going through a break up, getting into a new relationship too soon, etc, you know the drill. It was chaotic but somehow I got out of the chaos. I found peace with running. Running for me was really hard growing up (still is to this day) but somehow there was a moment in my life when running became my go to… I was looking for something I enjoyed doing and at that moment in my life, it was running. I was happy, I broke Personal Records. I was running faster than I thought I could ever be. It was an amazing feeling. I started focusing on Personal Records, going to every single running events there was, started working at a running store, research about running and reading books and stories about runners. I was so in Love with the thought that I could be a really good runner, relationship problems? What’s that!?!
BUT just like any other relationship, it got harder. Personal Records got harder to beat, running events got expensive, working a full time job and a part time job got tiring… I was starting to beat myself up for running. It was like a relationship that I didn’t recognize.
One day, I was running and thought to myself, will I be happy if I broke my foot? Will I be happy if I can’t do this anymore? Will I be happy if this was something I can never do again???
Don’t get me wrong, Running could still be very therapeutic at times for me but I started focusing more on finding true happiness within myself and not just depending on anything or anyone.
I took a break from running. I ran less miles, less times.
I just started focusing on being happy……….. I always have to be connected to something or someone. So, I read self help books, I went to the beach to just enjoy the sunrise, I slept in, I prepped meals, I just started taking care of myself more and also still running, when I want to and only when I want to.
I realized other aspects of what I thought was what happiness would look like.
I used to think having a family and children was the ultimate goal to happiness. Even planned to be married by 23 and kids right after, next thing you know I’m 29, with no relationship! Ha! Before this time, around 26-28, gosh! I focused so much on having a relationship and getting married! That made that whole transition chaotic for me. It wasn’t until I ran into an article (I’m sorry I’ve lost the article) but it talked about how having a family and children were just socially constructed as the ultimate happiness. After reading through that, and hearing other stories, I realized that those things are not the ultimate happiness.
That I should be happy with or without those things. I started looking at the future with far less expectations and just hoping that I will find true happiness even if things don’t go the way I planned.
There are different types of happiness and just like what the quote says if you’re not totally happy, if you are waiting to be happy, receiving all those things that you thought would make you happy, won’t actually make you happy.
You have to find happiness within yourself now, and I think you could do that by allowing yourself to accept what is. To not depend on things that can be easily taken away to make you happy.
Finding true love is giving yourself the ultimate love no one else can give you. I believe the ingredients of true love of oneself is forgiveness (so important!), trust & the ultimate acceptance of what, where and who you are.
Exploring True Happiness means finding true happiness from what is.
I hope this enlightened someone! And even if it just reaches one person! I would be happy!