How to be more consistent with yourself….

March 11, 2019: Today I felt refreshed, oh what a wonderful feeling.

I haven’t been myself lately and it completely took me off guard. I was super euphoric at some point and then bam I was kind of sad.

I want to study mental health more. I want to find out different ways to manage these kind of setbacks.

One of the things I keep hearing from my S.O., people I follow on IG, on YouTube and from people I admire and look up to is the word CONSISTENCY.

Oh you want to start a blog? a vlog? A business? You want to run faster and longer? The answer is consistency.

Being consistent just means showing up, doing what you said you’re going to do even on times you don’t feel like doing it. It’s fighting the curse of excuses and consistently winning over them.

In the beginning of this year, I set out to write something everyday, as much as I can. In the month of January, I was able to fulfill this goal. I wrote every night and I was able to post blogs and share them with my friends and my family. But then it got real. It got to the point where the thoughts I was writing were thoughts I did not feel comfortable enough to share, so I stopped. I was getting the gizz of it all. People were starting to follow me and at some point my page was visited more than 100 times. Why did I stop? I was so courageous and brave, I bought my domain and made my page official but then I stopped? Again, why did I stop? In the month of February, I barely wrote. I posted 2 entries on my page and didn’t share it with friends and family like I did on my other posts.

What stopped me? And what stops a lot of people from fulfilling their goals, their dreams and ultimately living the life they desire?

FEAR! For this question, Fear is the answer. A lot of the excuses that we make up are created to justify our fears. Fear of failing, fear of being ridiculed or not taken seriously, fear of judgment and many other forms of fear. Yes, fear comes in many forms and many times those fears create excuses that stop people from being consistent and firm with their plans and their ideas that ultimately prevents their consistency, leaving them stuck and afraid to move forward.

I set out to be braver this year round and my fear still got to me even with superb support system, being it my family, friends and most especially my S.O. I’ve never felt so supported and yet I still let fear hinder my consistency and most specially my growth.

Fear is truly one of the greatest enemy of consistency.

So how do you fight your fears to become more consistent with your words and your goals?

I have some ideas! I am willing to share them. They have been working for me for the past several weeks and I hope these ideas and concepts will help you be more consistent with achieving your goals:

  1. Knowing that fear is inevitable. With this in mind, I set myself up to success when I accept that fear will be present. I wonder and ponder on what might I be fearing to make up the excuses? My S.O. tells me, “don’t say you know when you really don’t.” You really have to dig deep sometimes. One of the things that helped me thru figuring out what I’m fearing is writing. I write the question, “why am I afraid of ________?” & then answer it. There are times where I would end up writing, “I don’t really fear this” at the end of my writing that leads me to realizing that the fear I have is not true and continue on to do what I set myself out to do.
  2. Lessening the pressure you put on yourself. I created a challenge to run 2 miles a day from February 11th to February 28th. I was fearful I would fail but one of the things that kept me going was reminding myself to not put so much pressure on myself. When I set up my run for the day, I quietly remind myself that “there’s no pressure & to do what I can.” Keeping that in mind put so much ease on my runs making my runs more enjoyable. I decided to share this journey on social media that ultimately led to Friends joining me on the challenge and they asked me what the rules were and I said, “No rules, No pressure.” I’ve been running for 32 days, as of March 14, 2019, way pass the time frame I had originally set out to do. I feel good and I don’t feel drained. My friends are super grateful and are happy they started the challenge too. If I had let fear set in and decided to not share my challenge, I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed it much and my friends wouldn’t have joined me. I set aside my fear of being ridiculed and my fear of failure. Setting them aside gave me the opportunity to share the joy of accomplishments with my friends and inspire people to be more active too. Not having the pressure I put on myself made myself more accountable and motivated.
  3. Be more organized. Try your best to be more organized, with your thoughts, your plans and whatever else is in your life. One night, I decided to create an online calendar, as my S.O. suggested {I talk to him a lot}. At first, I was stubborn and thought “No way!” but as soon as I started that calendar, a whole lot of thoughts and worries went out the window. I guess you carry these things on your mind too, the plans, the events, the commitments and many more. As I released these things to put on my calendar, my mind felt at ease, I don’t have to messed up things & I don’t have to miss any events. I can confidently plan, confidently think of other things, confidently focus on other things knowing that I am organized with my days. I also created tasked that I have been checking off each day that makes me feel accomplished vs it just being another day. Organizing can come in many forms too. The key idea of organizing is to have a clear path where your thoughts are not scattered and ultimately alleviate some of your fears of messing up or missing things, events or commitments.
  4. Trust yourself more. I remind myself this all the time. Part of my anxiety battles were brought about because of my self mistrust. For a while, I didn’t trust myself (at all). I’ve come a long way and realizing that Loving Yourself is Trusting Yourself changed my life {for not only the better but for the best}. Even if you fail, even if you make a mistake, even if people are against it, you have to trust that you did the best you could with whatever resources were presented and were available to you. We are all human, we are wired to fail & wired to overcome them too but when we let our fears fight our battles we really don’t get too far. Being brave and fearless can only happen if you give yourself the trust you deserve! Trust that your talented, Trust that you have something important and meaningful to say. Trust that you can inspire. Trust that you are a wonderful human being. Trust that you can overcome all your fears and Trust that you can be consistent with your plans. Just trust and believe in yourself.
  5. “Replace can’t with maybe.” by Alexi Pappas. There’s no other way to word this. I hear and read a lot about the idea that what you say and what you believe to be is actually what happens and what becomes of you. So every time I say things like “I’m not fast”, “I’m not a writer”, or “I can’t do this”, I replace them with more positive thoughts (when I catch it). I am more aware of the thoughts and words I say about myself. I remind myself of words like “not yet”, inspired by Charlie Rocket, to remind myself that there’s always opportunities for growth and even though it feels and seem unattainable, if you ignore those fears, there’s always a chance: a chance to grow, a chance to be faster, a chance to be better, a chance to be who you want yourself to be. So be inspired, follow people who started from where you think you are and witness them face their fears and fulfill the things you dream of to remind yourself that there is always a chance to “replace can’t with maybe.
  6. Another one that I [try to] do and would like to share is to celebrate every accomplishments. It doesn’t matter how small they are, those accomplishments are meant to be celebrated and be proud of. Small things could lead to big things. The little more that you do the closer you get to your goals, the BIG Things. I feel that by celebrating every accomplishments makes being consistent more enjoyable and less pressured. You finished a book, celebrate! You read 3 pages of a book, celebrate! Be grateful for yourself, for trying and for facing your fears! Celebrate yourself for getting up every morning and be grateful for being able to and being given the opportunity just to do something, anything. Celebrate the idea that you are capable and that you have all the opportunities in the world to do what you love you just have to face your fears!

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